A new day

I feel refreshed.

I always remember September as a time of renewal, fresh starts and opportunity. Unopened markers with tips still sharp and pointed. New pencils yet to be chewed. A wardrobe of fall clothes that would finally grant me membership in the popular crowd. The chance to re-define oneself and start anew.

Since I graduated from university, September has lost some of its meaning for me. Every time September would roll around, I would feel more annoyed by the incessant back to school advertising. But this year is different. My son started Kindergarten today.

My old excitement of fresh starts has returned and I can't wait to see what the future holds. My son continues to amaze and humble me as all children do for their parents. He is his own person and I'm slowly accepting that. And with that growing acceptance, I learn that I, too, am my own person.

I'm excited about his future and now mine as well.

In search of....what?

What exactly am I trying to find? Fabulosity? Fabulousness?

Whatever the word, I want to create a new "me."

For years I thought that "when I grow up" or "before I get too old" I would become a truly fabulous, interesting, confident woman. I'm 33 now and it's time. I need to overhaul my body, my hair, my skin, my makeup, my clothes, my shoes, my accessories, my posture, and my attitude.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not exactly a troll. I'm just a woman who let things slide a bit for a couple of years. When I get cleaned up, I look pretty good but why can't I look good all the time? Why do I need a special event to pull together a good outfit and fantastic makeup and hair? I don't! I've just forgotten that even though I'm a busy working mom, I'm allowed to take care of myself.

I'm starting with my physique. I was once a bodybuilder (not the freaky kind - just a lightweight!) so I know I have the experience and ability to create an incredible body. But the willpower...where did that go? I dieted hard for 20 weeks before each show. Oh, right, when you don't commit to parading around on a stage mostly naked in front of hundreds of people, dieting and working out doesn't have the same level of importance. Well, the willpower is back and I'm ready to go.

I'm starting tomorrow with ditching the junk. Hence the chocolate chip cookies I am devouring right now. Natural foods will be my best friends. Lower carbs, healthy fats, moderate protein and unlimited veggies are the plan.

Exercise will begin again. Instead of traditional bodybuilding and cardio, I'll be doing more of a circuit-style of training with maximum oxygen debt. I'll also begin flexibility training. Still considering yoga. Perhaps for the adorable clothes? Wait - I must drop some fat before slipping into my lululemon.

I'll be monitoring my progress mostly by how I look, feel and fit in my clothes. While my weight isn't the defining factor for my success, I will be monitoring it. So, my first weigh-in is tomorrow.

And with that, I'm off to prepare some food for tomorrow and drink a bunch of water to help flush out the water I'll be holding from these cookies!